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My Emotional Standard?

Yes, this entire blog post is about toilet paper. Please enter sarcastic and vibrant language where necessary.

I am sorry and I am excited for you all at the same time. BTW, it has nothing to do with butt wiping. Stay with me if you need a chuckle.

This story began years ago when the kids were small and no one in the house would put a new, full roll of toilet paper on the empty holder. Like, no one. My Mom did it when she tidied up after a full day of minding the kids. The cleaners (no judgment please) would do it for us as well. Between all 4 of us, it seemed as if no one really thought much about the next person in line using the potty.

March 2020 hit and we had a toilet paper craze in the country. Like no kidding, the shelves were empty everywhere. No biggie for us, we had a secret stash -just like salt, I always hoard salt for the apocalypse- not actually thinking we will ever need these things beyond using them because of extreme laziness or forgetfulness. We are 8 months into this mess now and I am going to tell you how we are really doing in this house with the help of a basic item like toilet paper.

When TP was scarce early on in the Pandemic, I counted rolls and intentionally re-filled all the rolls on the regular. Like, I was dedicated and so proud of me(us) for really trying to immediately take the 6 seconds and re-fill the holder with a new roll. I mean right away. We slowed down and frankly, we kinda cared a bit more.

My best girlfriends and I each have standards for how we are doing emotionally. Often, it revolves around laundry, clean kitchens/bathrooms, kids' artwork, and the work we are actually supposed to be doing. For me and my house, IF we are still putting on deodorant in the morning - WE ARE OK. Whew! It’s when I have not bought deodorant for anyone in the house for a while, I begin to ask questions and worry.

How are you really doing? (now pause)

Ya, I know, it’s all hard.

Anyway, the last six weeks have been absolutely brutal emotionally with some big losses and worries. Our family is mourning so much and about so many different things.

I continued caring about toilet paper for a few months into the pandemic.

Then I went through the summer “on-strike”. It was really up and down with the irritation and frustration of this dire situation. I had had enough. I was not going to baby them all. They need to really complete this simple task. My patience was thinning and the number of times I had to run for the secret stash of tp was, frankly, embarrassing. I kept thinking, I taught these guys how to do this right?

***FYI - I swear this is WHY we Moms sometimes think to ourselves, am I crazy, OR are they?***

So, in September, every parents’ “Happy New Year”, I thought I would find some patience, use my organization skills, and we would sit at the table, like a “functional” family and have real discussions. I called a Family Meeting (my kiddos will tell you I LOVE family meetings lol)

I DID get my chance to walk them through the steps on how to change the finished roll of toilet paper and replace it with a new roll. The three of them looked at me like I was insane.

In these last few weeks, I am finding empty rolls once in a while and I can now smile at them with warmth like they are an old friend. They are comforting in some way. The OCD in me has let go of fighting about this. Big picture, who cares? As long as I know where the stash is, well then, I suppose it is no longer my concern.

At least I tried.

My family did not approve this message.

Thank you for reading this story, it has been such a big part of how we are getting through these hard times. It is a measurement of our health and wellness and general well being.




*the above message may provide you with a giggle


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